Infertility

Posts relating to infertility

Five Reasons to Embrace an Unplanned Age Gap Between Your Kids

Secondary infertility sucks. It sucks for a lot of reasons but among the suckiest is that it’s not just about you having a baby. It’s also about your child having a sibling. The years just keep passing and not only are you getting older but so is your existing child. For a long time it ate me […]

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Momming After Infertility: It’s Okay to Have a Bad Day

Is there anything in the world more frustrating than having your plans thwarted at pretty much every turn? This was my day today. Thwart, thwart, thwart. Nothing but unadulterated thwartage. If this day had a name it would be Thwart McThwartson. This happens a lot when you are a mom. I really wanted to get […]

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Getting Myself Back: Depression, Anxiety, and Infertility

About six weeks after Maria was born I started to notice something peculiar. I was feeling…absolutely amazing? It first hit me one day when I was fumbling around in the kitchen and I realized I was singing. And not just singing but singing some goofy parody that I was making up as I went along. […]

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You are NOT Emotionally Homeless

Secondary infertility can feel like emotional homelessness. What do I mean by that? Well. You have a child. But real moms have children. Real moms are jugging multiple kids, multiple schedules, multiple meltdowns and double or triple the mess. Real moms birthed families. I can’t tell you how many times a well intentioned “real mom” said […]

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How Romance Reading Saved My Sanity: Infertility and the Baby Making Bedroom

Real Talk. If you are related to me or my husband, perhaps a former teacher or just generally someone who DOES NOT want to see me talk about sex, be ye warned. I mean it. Stop reading! Get out of here, Dad. Incoming awkward subject. But I know I cannot be the only one who […]

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It’s Not a Competition

Today wasn’t the best day. You would think that “infertility” ends after you have that miracle baby. But it doesn’t. It didn’t. Today is a day when anxiety is kicking my ass again. It’s trying to make me doubt that what I went through even counts. That I shouldn’t be talking about it because it […]

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Yes, I’m Still Watching: How ‘The Office’ Carried Me Through Infertility

Actually, yes, Netflix. I am still watching The Office. I’m still watching it now and I was still watching it every time you asked me during the two and half miserable years when we were trying and failing to have another baby. I couldn’t stop watching. When I was watching Michael stumbling and flailing about […]

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A Break in the Clouds: Our Infertility Story (4)

In late September of 2016 we tried our first and only IUI procedure. Our favorite doctor recommended it to us as the next logical step after not having success with Clomid. The whole thing was completely surreal. The medication. The scans. Standing in my kitchen and letting Bill administer a shot. The procedure itself. The […]

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Dark Skies: Our Infertility Story (3)

For me, infertility had three distinct phases. Each one had its own painful theme. Phase One: We deserve to get pregnant because of how much this sucks, please, God, please. Technically the first year we were trying we were not yet considered “infertile”. But Gemma was almost three. Three!!! I’d spent ALL of 2014 obsessing […]

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The Wind and the Rain: Our Infertility Story (2)

We had been trying to get pregnant for four months when Bill’s mother died. A year before Bill and I got married she had been diagnosed with a progressive lung disease called pulmonary fibrosis. It’s a rare disease and I wouldn’t be surprised if you’ve never heard of it. But it kills as many people […]

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